Writing Your Unexpected Life
A writing retreat for women who have lived something worth telling
May 16 - 21, 2026
Chateau de Borie, Agen, France
Limited to 5 participants
I never planned to write a memoir. At the prompting of my therapist, I sat down at my computer two years after September 11th and typed the date — September 11, 2001 — and the words came. What started as a way to record events for my kids before I forgot them became a form of therapy in itself.
What I didn't know then, and had to learn the hard way, was that having a story is not the same as knowing how to tell it. Memoir has a shape. It needs an entry point, a turn, an understanding of what the whole thing actually meant — not just what happened. I spent a long time writing the story I thought I was telling before I found the real one underneath it.
That discovery — the moment you find what the story is actually about — is the most important thing I can help you reach. And five days, it turns out, is enough time to get there.
You don't need to prepare anything before you arrive. You don't need to know which story you're telling. We find it together, starting on the first morning.
What This Is
A small group of women — five of you, and me — at my château in the south of France. Five days of morning writing sessions, one-on-one time with me, afternoon excursions into the countryside, and evenings to let the work settle over chef-prepared meals.
Finding the shape of your story and getting it onto the page.
By the end of five days, you will know what your story is, where it begins, and what it means. You will have written parts of it. That feeling — of having finally having a clear direction for your writing — is what you take home.
The women you write alongside will become something more than fellow participants. There is something about hearing someone's intimate story — and being heard in return — that creates deep and lasting friendships.
What You Will Actually Learn
Before I wrote my memoir, I did courses, read widely, and sat with other writers. Here is what changed everything for me — and what we will work on together:
How to mine your memories. We start here, on day one. Not with the story — with the raw material. Small, specific exercises, ten minutes at a time, designed to surface the moments you have stopped noticing because you have lived with them so long. What emerges in those ten minutes usually surprises people.
How to find what your story is actually about. Most people arrive with one story in mind. Often by day two they have found the real one underneath it — the thing the surface story was pointing at all along. Helping you locate that is one of the most important things I do.
How to find your entry point. Not at the beginning. Not at the end. Somewhere precise and charged — the moment that contains the whole story in miniature.
The difference between memoir and journaling. A journal records what happened. Memoir asks what it meant — and it needs an arc: a before, a middle, and an after. Understanding this early saves months of confusion.
How to handle time and memory. Memoir is not entirely chronological. Learning to compress, slow down, and move through time is one of the core skills of the form.
How to write from inside the emotion without drowning in it. There is a difference between feeling something and rendering it on the page. We will find that line.
What to leave out. The story you are telling is not everything that happened. Knowing what belongs on the page — and what belongs only in your memory — is a skill, and a significant one.
About the Retreat
The Retreat Experience
The Shape of Five Days
Day 1 — Arrival
Settle into the château. Get to know the other women, the house, the rhythm of the place. An opening conversation — no writing yet — where we take stock of where everyone is, what brought them here, and what they are carrying. Dinner together. The work begins tomorrow.
Day 2 — Mining
This is where we start. Not with the story — with the memories beneath it. Short, focused exercises, ten minutes at a time, designed to surface the specific moments, images, and details that tell you where your story actually lives. We look at different ways of collecting and sifting memory until something catches. One-on-one time with me. An afternoon excursion to let things settle.
Day 3 — Writing & Sharing
We write. With a clearer sense now of what the story is and where it begins, the morning session moves into drafting — finding the opening, following the arc, staying inside the voice. Optional sharing in the afternoon, always in a safe and generous circle. More one-on-one time. The story is taking shape.
Day 4 — Deepening & Completion
The final full working day. We return to what has been written and go deeper — into the emotional truth of it, the structure, what belongs and what doesn't. By the end of this day, you have clarity about your story. You will understand what it means. That feeling — of having finally done it — is what you take home.
Day 5 — Departure
People leave before noon. There is coffee, a slow breakfast, time to sit with what the week has been. No agenda. Just the particular quiet of a group of women who have done something together that they didn't quite believe they could.
What You Leave With
Snippets, scenes, and fragments — the raw material of your story, unearthed and on the page for the first time.
A deeper clarity about what your story is actually about. Not the version you arrived with, but the real one underneath it.
Your own voice on the page, not a version of what you imagine good writing should sound like.
The ability to separate what belongs in the story from what belongs only in your memory.
A roadmap for what comes next — whether that is keep writing, revise quietly, share with someone you trust, or simply let it settle.
Your host:
Abigail Carter (and Lulu)
Why Me?
I led my first memoir workshop after publishing The Alchemy of Loss — the book I wrote about losing my husband on September 11th, and about what came after. I have written through the unexpected, published something deeply personal, rebuilt my life multiple times, and learned — mostly the hard way — what it takes to find the shape of a true story.
I have a unique ability to help people see the themes hidden within their own stories and thus find clarity in whatever project they bring to the table.
I know how hard it is sit your butt in the chair and write, and then to find authenticity within those words. I also know that the craft is learnable, and that there is no shortage of courage in the women who are drawn to this kind of work. What is sometimes missing is the structure, the permission, and someone in the room who has actually been there.
Pricing
Premium Room:
Cygne, Etoile, Gingko, Rossignol, Jasmin
Solo: €3,350
Shared: €3,000 per person
Standard Room:
Magnolia, Colibri, Chouette, Renard,
Lapin, Paon
Solo: €2,950
Shared: €2,650 per person
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All rooms have a private bathroom down the hall with the exception of:
Rossignol: Partial ensuite (shower down the hall)
Jasmin: Full ensuite
Twin/2-bed options are ideal for friends:
Lapin (two doubles),
Paon (double + single),
Cygne (double + single).
Rooms with one bed are perfect for solo guests or couples.
All prices include five nights’ accommodation at the château, all meals, excursions, and one-on-one sessions. Travel to and from France is not included.
A deposit of €1000 secures your place.
Balance due by April 15, 2026.
Premium Rooms
With the exception of Jasmin, which has a full ensuite and is on the third floor, all the premium rooms are on the second floor and have private bathrooms down the hall.
Standard Rooms
All Standard rooms are on the third floor with private bathrooms down the hall.
Chateau de Borie
Chateau de Borie is located in Pont-du-Casse, just a five minute drive from Agen, located between Toulouse and Bordeaux in an area renown for it’s fresh fruits and vegetables, particularly its dried prunes. The area is a little off the beaten path for many tourists, but boasts beautiful countryside, proximity to two splendid wine regions, historic “Bastide” villages and incredibly fresh local food.
Express Your Interest
Places are limited to five women. If this feels like yours, I would love to hear from you.
Registrations close on March 31st, 2026.
Please fill out the form. I will respond personally to every enquiry. If you are unsure whether this retreat is right for you, mention it in the form, and we can talk it through.
The Details
The Chateau de Borie is multi-leveled, with no bedrooms on the ground floor. Good physical mobility is required for retreat, as the Chateau has one or two sets of stairwells depending on the room you choose, and we will be on foot on the cobbled streets around France. The physical ability to walk unassisted is necessary for this retreat.
Because of the proximity of the cliffs and the seven springs on the property, mosquitos are an issue between July and October. Bug spray is highly recommended.
Lulu, Abby’s Boston Terrier will be in attendance. She is very companionable, but if you have any issues with small dogs, you might want to consider this before booking.
Participants might want to consider arriving in France a day or two before the retreat to get acclimated. Toulouse is an enjoyable place to explore. Citiz Hotel in Toulouse is well situated a block from the train station and a block from the center of town and is reasonably priced.
Travel
Arrivals: Saturday, May 16th, before 4 pm
Retreat/workshops: Sunday, May 17th - Wednesday, May 20th, 2026
Departures: Thursday, May 21st, before 12 pm.
Class participants are responsible for their own flights and travel to Agen. The closest international airports are Toulouse and Bordeaux, France. It is an hour's train ride to Agen from both cities. You can also fly to Paris and take a 3-hour TGV train from Montparnasse station in Paris to Agen (via Bordeaux).
It is recommended that you purchase your train tickets ahead of time, as trains do fill up. We recommend using www.thetrainline.com or https://www.sncf-connect.com/ to book your connections.
You are welcome to rent a car at the airport, though we will be providing transportation for the various excursions, so unless you want to get out on your own, it is unnecessary.
We provide pick-ups and drop-offs between the Agen train station and Chateau de Borie.
NOTE: To arrive at the Chateau on Saturday, May 16th, requires a flight departure from North America on Friday, May 15th.
€1,000 deposit is non-refundable after March 31, 2026. Balance due by April 15th.
Cancellations between April 1 and May 1: 100% refund of balance if spot is filled, 50% refund of balance if not, or transfer credit within 12 months
No refunds after May 1, 2026
We strongly recommend trip/medical cancellation insurance
